Thursday, May 24, 2012

A MAN'S UNHEARD VOICE



    
I tend to think that I may be a bit of a Men's Activist, Yes I said it, should I be a ashamed of this fact? As a father to a son and as a man myself shouldn't I be entitled to speak up against the many important issues and injustices that go unseen or unheard that continually affect the male community as a whole? Does this make me a Woman hating misogynistic monster that has no sense of the feminized struggle and the goals that they have reached in their own accomplishments?
Why must I walk the line of political correctness and be concerned as to not be viewed as a insensitive villain based on my belief that I feel young men and men as a whole are in need. Real men are a dying breed. I see the decline and loss of manhood daily in our male community, from the way we are damaging our young men by not allowing their masculinity flourish, the lack of educational goals we set, to the way we are portrayed in media and the lack of legal rights we have as men as a whole.

Where did we men go wrong? Men get blame for being history’s conquerors and killers, but no credit for being its innovators and healers. We hear about how women “create life” while men only destroy it, but forgotten are the fruits of men’s labors through out history and in our communities. The seeds that have been planted from childhood of "boys being bad and girls being good', as simple as it may sound have had a tremendous affect on the male mind set. The past generations of single mothers and absent fathers has created a perfect storm of male destruction. Could all of this be why tests in 2009 by the Program for International Student Assessment showed that education is one of the many areas where young men are steadily falling behind, boys lagged a year behind girls at reading in every industrialized country in the world. Women now make up the large majority of undergraduates, young men are lacking at every level of schooling worse grades, lower college attendance than girls and are at a greater likelihood that they’ll be targeted to be diagnosed ADHD and given Ritalin. Males make up the largest group of high school drop outs and unemployed individuals world wide. 90% of people in prison are male. These are facts, not assumptions. These problems are reaching catastrophic levels, never a second thought is given to this decline nor whether men might be discriminated against or not at all.

Custody law is perhaps the best-known area of men's discrimination, in most parts of the world custody rights cases are stacked firmly against men. When the man is the primary care-giver his chances of winning custody are lower than when the woman is the primary care-giver. Even when the case is not contested by the mother, he's still not as likely to get custody as when the woman's claim is uncontested. Discrimination against women is rigorously challenged, no such protection is afforded to men in legal realms.



The media also allows women to objectify and ridicule men in a way that would be unthinkable if the gender roles were reversed. A study by the National Fatherhood Initiative found that fathers are eight times more likely than mothers to be portrayed negatively on network television.
Ward Cleaver and Bill Cosby have been replaced by an array of Dumb incompetent Dads.
Why this change? The most obvious reason is that the television audience has subscribed to passive gender discrimination, and sitcoms are now a female domain. Four out of five viewers of network sitcoms are women, and they apparently like to see Mom smarter than Dad. But where does that leave the the young man that has no father figure in his home and looks to media for a role model or some blue print of what a man is to be. Overall men have increased their share of the child care and housework while still working 14 hours longer outside the home than mothers do each week in the past 10 years (post absent daddy generation). Still, no matter how much Dads do in real life, television, will find a ways to make the female sitcom audience laugh at men's expense.


The problem here should be obvious ,the anti-male attitude in a highly-feminized society needs to be addressed. The mistake of feeding our young men the stereotype male figures and "you are not the father images" in the pro woman Oprah type media, becomes the mold that is set for an impressionable generation of boys. Boys have a tremendous amount of “creative energy.” This force is powerful, and it will either be focused constructively or destructively. Young men can become Einsteins or Cavemen, Men need to take a stand and make the difference, that will spark an effect in a young man from being a drug dealer to becoming a doctor. the tragedy of today is that in the success of feminism search to be equal, we have tipped the scales and have damaged the foundation for most young men that will inevitably fall through the cracks.

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When I say this, mind you, I mean it with neither a positive nor negative connotation towards woman, nor do I feel I must apologize for my thoughts on this matter,I'm just Identifying a problem that has gone on for too long. I feel MEN and WOMAN alike should do their best to meet this issue head on to save our young men that will one day become the pillar patriarchs of our communities and the fathers of our future.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Panama to Costa Rica to a Better Understanding of Self ......


As humans we can not divide our spiritual nature from the other aspects of personality.  We were created so that we will seek balance between all the aspects of life:  We can not understand everything or our place in the world if we are experiencing upset in our emotional life, such as feeling unworthy or unloved.  Our mental aspects is were our intellect helps us define our understanding of self, and so on. 


I am at a point in my life that is urgent need for change and I didn't even know it. The old ways are just not working. Many of my current problems seem to be a repeat of the past. At best these issues are systemic, at worst, they are chronic, either way, there are too many apparently unsolvable issues. Everyone Remember all of us have our issues. The outside forces that  produce a state of anxiety, stress and depression.  We may not have the time, the resources, and  knowledge available to resolve all of the issues. We need to re-engineer our thinking in order to solve these problems. The very mechanics ourselves.




Isn’t it time for a new approach?
Is a new point of view possible?



The questions I was faced with this past week during meditation....  yes i said meditation.
Am I living my life to the best of my ability and if i am not what am I doing to achieve this goal.



Thank you to my Panama Tribe Family Members I have learned so much from all of you.
Thank you Panama for breathing a fresh breath in to my soul.

When is Enough Enough ?






How many of us think we haven't or we are not doing enough in our own lives?
I have a busy schedule, and so many things are going on in my life. But for some reason,
I think whatever I do was never enough. I recall many times saying or thinking to myself
"you aren’t doing enough",
when in fact I was and I am probably still doing more than I need to in life.
So if I do so much and I am so tired and burnt out, why do I feel like I don't have much to show nor have I reached the goals I have set for myself ?
I stopped to think and I noticed when people get so overly busy, they are looking for answers, hope, time and excuses to a way out in what they are doing. Not truly working towards their own personal goals. We become to Busy with others problems, others goals, others successes that we get distracted from their own goals, to Busy to not see a decline in your own mental,finical, physical and relationships health. We get involved in everything that comes our way, but we aren’t finding time to better ourselves, just a bunch of work, stress and burdens. And I believe it’s because we are chasing things that are not for us and that don't help us move forward. Its easy for us to do the same thing day in and day out no matter how much we dislike it because it's not as scary as the unknown.
WOW I think that makes a lot of sense but why would you or I not want to invest in our own goals or success. Could it be are creatures of habit?
Are we becoming our own stumbling blocks?
have we become OK moving along in life as blind mice because that's what everyone else is doing. When does the habit of wanting to better our life come in and replace the the habit of being complacent in being average or working below our own potential.

 ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! NEVER SETTLE!!!!

Monday, February 13, 2012

HAMMER & NAILS


SOME PEOPLE ARE BORN TO BE HAMMERS AND SOME PEOPLE ARE BORN TO BE THE NAILS.

I heard this statement today and it almost made me laugh, but in the utmost simplicity of this comment it really made me think. What is the real difference and why are some people just complacent with being the bottom guy or the laborer. What took that spark from them ( was it ever there ) to make them accept this and on the other hand why is it that some people will never accept mediocrities in their lives.

Did this spark burn out or was it just never lit ?


To be honest I dont even know where to begin with so many ways to approch this topic. All I know is that a Hammer lives in me and if I can light the spark in other to be a Hammer or not allow the spark to burn out in atleast one person I feel that I have done something right.

I have a feeling that this will not be the last time I vist this topic.....


 

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A MAN ?



What does it mean to be a man today?
Can men express their masculinity without becoming cold or closed-hearted or wimpy and emasculated ?
What’s a conscious man ?


A man understands and respects the power of choice. He lives a life of his own creation.He locks on to his target like a guided missile. There’s no guarantee he’ll reach his target, and he knows this, but he doesn’t need guarantees. A man doesn’t require the approval of others. He is willing to follow his heart and stand firm on his own feet.

A man knows he must commit to something greater than satisfying the needs of a few people. When others observe that a man is committed to his values and morals, he gains their trust and respect, even when he cannot gain their support. The way for a man to lose the respect of others as well as his own self-respect  is to violate his own values.Whenever a man sacrifices his integrity, he loses his freedom… and himself as well. He then becomes an object of pity.

 A man’s self-trust is one of his greatest assets. When he second-guesses himself by worrying about failure, he defeats himself. An intelligent man considers the prospect of failure, but he doesn’t preoccupy himself with worry. He accepts that if a failure occurs, he can deal with it. A man grows more from failure than he does from his success. Success cannot test his resolve in the way that failure can.When a man plays it safe, his has loss the opportunities to be greater for not only himself but the people and community that believe in him.


A MAN CAN CHANGE A WORLD OF YOUNG MEN BY NOT HIS WORDS BUT BY HIS ACTIONS.

A man is a giver of love, not a just a receiver. A man is the first to say “I love you.” The universe does not respond to hesitation. It is a man's  job to share his love with the world.. A man accepts the consequences of being male, he makes no apologies for his nature. The male path is filled with obstacles. These obstacles help a man discover what’s truly important to him. Through repeated obstacles a man learns to search for worthy goals and to eliminate goals that are unworthy.

A man actively seeks out the company of people who inspire and challenge him, and he removes those who hold him back. A man doesn’t blame others for his problems. .A man holds himself accountable for the relationships he allows into his life. He holds others accountable for their behavior, but he holds himself accountable for his decision to tolerate such behavior.A man teaches others how to treat him by the relationships he’s willing to allow into his life.

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.

.....WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A MAN .....

FATHER, BROTHER, UNCLE, HUSBAND, BOYFRIEND, SON
MAN