HAMMER & NAILS

SOME PEOPLE ARE BORN TO BE HAMMERS AND SOME PEOPLE ARE BORN TO BE THE NAILS.

I heard this statement today and it almost made me laugh, but in the utmost simplicity of this comment it really made me think. What is the real difference and why are some people just complacent with being the bottom guy or the laborer. What took that spark from them ( was it ever there ) to make them accept this and on the other hand why is it that some people will never accept mediocrities in their lives.

Did this spark burn out or was it just never lit ?

To be honest I dont even know where to begin with so many ways to approch this topic. All I know is that a Hammer lives in me and if I can light the spark in other to be a Hammer or not allow the spark to burn out in atleast one person I feel that I have done something right.

I have a feeling that this will not be the last time I vist this topic.....

 

Can a zebra change it's stripes

Ever heard the expression “a zebra never changes its stripes” or “a leopard never changes its spots”? They’re used in reference to change, or more accurately, inability to change. Simply put it means that people’s personalities are unlikely to shift suddenly in one direction or another. An expression that encapsulates this thought is one you’ve most likely already heard, “once a cheater, always a cheater”.
I’m beginning to believe that the thought of people changing, myself included,
is more along the lines of fantasy, not reality. It seems more fitting to say that the pattern people’s personalities take as they mature is one of growth, not change.

For a change to occur in a person’s behavior there has to first be a revelation,
a moment of clarity where they realize something is wrong or that a situation could have been handled better. Not easily manufactured! Yet even with revelation,
it’s assumed that they have the humility to admit fault and want to change.

Rest assured I’m not losing my faith in humanity; rather I’m identifying trends in human behavior, which I’m only beginning to understand. The expectation that people “can” change, even if they want to has proven to me a foolish one.
In my experience this only leads to anguish and frustration.

The gravity of the expression “a zebra never changes its stripes” is often felt when trying to answer the question, what do I do when someone I care about cannot get passed a monumental path of errors and mistakes that constanly take them down the wrong path,yet they seem so insignificant to them.
When all you want for them is freedom from their self-perpetuating internal jail, yet your seemingly helpful words fall on deaf ears.

Well I’m still working that one out, but what I do know for certain is that you cannot change for them. I know that sounds obvious but the truth is you cannot sacrifice yourself for someone with an expectation that your sacrifice will give them an “ahh ha” experience. In many cases the kindest yet hardest thing you can do is let them fall. Change as it seems, is futile without consequence.

My feelings towards someone being able to alter their personality for the better (provided they want to) as radically as “change” implies, are similar to those I have for someone trying to quit smoking cold turkey, it’s painful for them, it’s unpleasant for everyone around them and it rarely works.

Upon reflection of recent personal experiences, the validity of the expression “a zebra never changes its stripes” appears more accurate than I want to believe.

That said, people can suprise you, they’re just unlikely to.